Well, I finally done it.
I bought myself a pair of E.B’s (embarrassment boots).
Boots that would have you drawn and quartered by the fashion police if you dared step foot outside your front door wearing them.
I had to buy them.
My feet were getting cold, up here in the hills, and I needed fur lined boots that would keep me warm.
There was a special on at our local store for E.B’s and I spent much time deciding whether to buy them.
Hmm, warm feet or be cool.
My feet made the decision so I decided to try a pair on.
To make sure I wasn’t seen with the E.B’s, I hid behind the rack and sat on a chair.
There’s nothing worse than being caught with E.B’s.
I tried the size 11, yes I do have big feet, but they were a bit tight.
Then I tried the size 12’s and they fitted well.
Now the only problem was to get out of the store without embarrassing myself holding a pair of E.B’s.
Ah yes, the answer.
I used the shirt I was about to buy to cover the boots as I walked to the check out point.
So far so good.
Now for the ordeal of revealing the E.B’s to the sales clerk.
I used all my charm and distracting techniques – ‘nice day, how are you, love the display.’
It didn’t fool her as she knew I had an E.B affliction.
She was kind and quickly processed the order and placed the E.B’s in a bag.
Phew, I walked to my car, incognito and incoherent but happy I had made it this far.
When I got home I placed the E.B’s on the floor.
Two days later I tried them on.
And you know what?
They are comfortable and warm.
Even though they are the most ‘Embarrassing Boots’ I own.