Well, I finally done it.
I bought myself a pair of E.B’s (embarrassment boots).
E.B's Modelled By C.B.
Boots that would have you drawn and quartered by the fashion police if you dared step foot outside your front door wearing them.
I had to buy them.
My feet were getting cold, up here in the hills, and I needed fur lined boots that would keep me warm.
There was a special on at our local store for E.B’s and I spent much time deciding whether to buy them.
Hmm, warm feet or be cool.
My feet made the decision so I decided to try a pair on.
To make sure I wasn’t seen with the E.B’s, I hid behind the rack and sat on a chair.
There’s nothing worse than being caught with E.B’s.
I tried the size 11, yes I do have big feet, but they were a bit tight.
Then I tried the size 12’s and they fitted well.
Now the only problem was to get out of the store without embarrassing myself holding a pair of E.B’s.
Ah yes, the answer.
I used the shirt I was about to buy to cover the boots as I walked to the check out point.
So far so good.
Now for the ordeal of revealing the E.B’s to the sales clerk.
I used all my charm and distracting techniques – ‘nice day, how are you, love the display.’
It didn’t fool her as she knew I had an E.B affliction.
She was kind and quickly processed the order and placed the E.B’s in a bag.
Phew, I walked to my car, incognito and incoherent but happy I had made it this far.
When I got home I placed the E.B’s on the floor.
Two days later I tried them on.
And you know what?
They are comfortable and warm.
Even though they are the most ‘Embarrassing Boots’ I own.
